16 jan. 2013

To Hell And Back, I Return Broken



To Hell And Back, I Return Broken

You will never let me get out of this alive,
you scratch my chest until it bleeds,
burning me in the flames of hell,

I numb you with false calm,
force the night upon me to escape,

You become stronger, 
you build your strenght on my fear,
I fight, Fight, FIGHT for my life!
But you will be my life long companion.

You tear me apart, piece by piece
I become  your prisoner,
Forever trying to find a way out,

The gates of hell are open, 
but the way up is long,
I fall and you drag me back in chains,

I scream, but no one comes,
fading away,
I am a dying star,
to broken to shine,

You appear stronger then ever,
you give me the kiss of death and life,
then you whisper,
I give you hope,

You give me a torch and say,
This will lead you,

I am torn to shreds, 
marked forever by the flames of hell,
vounerable and changed,
stronger but weak,

I now leave a shadow
that will always be right behind me,
when light is upon me you fade, 
in darkness you are always 
as close as you can be,

I can never flee from you, 
accept is all I can do,
force you away with numbing help,
you will always be there for me,

You are my closest friend and enemy,
The bond between us will never break,
it is forever you and me,
There is no escape,

We are united as one,

But you will NEVER define me!


(This is the Emotion Anxiety) 




4 jan. 2013

Loss comes in many shapes..



(Picture by John Bauer)


Misstakes never learned from,
are punished by the deepest of pain,
the outmost regret

I will now vanish,
 vanish for you,
never again let you in to my life,
the cracks are too obvious,
to you,

I will give you an empty shell,
 one you can never destroy ,
what is already gone,
once again
 is never again,

I will die with this inside,
and you will never know,

Pretend is a game well known,
 all that is real,
that is all I have ever known,

The most intimate moment,
and I am alone,
I am fake,
I give what you want
nothing more,

Tears hidden behind forced smiles,
 is a passed,
it turned into the future,
built on unspoken truths

I will now be a stranger,
to you,
false and unheard,
a passed never to be resolved

Blame is all that is left,
twisted truths are spoken,
never accepted,

I am forever hidden,
for you,
I shall be unknown,
Always,
to you

Resentment will be our love,
and so,
Love will be our one regret,
covered in each others misery,

Words never spoken is how I leave you,
I am left with the lies of a broken tounge,

whispers are dwelling in the shadows,
As we together stand,
split as two

I will never be yours,
again,
Lost if forever lost,
in me,
I feel nothing, if anything at all,

There is nothing there
anymore,
the passed is infront,
and what is,
is now me alone,

its over, you are gone.